Classic Sera profile #2. It's a Guy!

Commented on by Kaiyu and Alina.

Kaiyu says: Shall we do Sera #2?
Alina says: Let's.
Kaiyu says: This character almost raped a female character tentacle-demon style.
Alina says: Eww....


Kaiyu says: HELLO, GUY!
Alina says: Ladies and's GUY LAFLEUR!
Kaiyu says: That's about as good as saying HEY YOU.
Alina says: Guy is a name in Quebec. But it's still a bad name.

Foreign Devil
Player: Sera
Age: Unknown
Birthdate/Astrological Sign: Unknown
Gender: Male
Race: He is believed to be human...
Blood type: O

Alina says: Pure-cop out stuff.
Kaiyu says: We also don't have a last name, and Guy isn't exactly a period name.
Alina says: No.
Kaiyu says: Age unknown, race unknown, birthdate unknown, where are my pills unknown...
Alina says: (Sera) Uh...race...devil, but no, that's not good enough, so it'll be a foreign devil, player, me, age, who cares, astro stuff, whatever, race, I'll just put human even though I made it clear I'm not...

Hair Color/Style: Black and spiky. He wears a helmet most of the time.
Eye Color/Eye Shape: Green with a red tinge to them.
Voice: ???
Appearance: He is close to about 7 feet tall. Guy is normally dressed in full plate mail with runes along the plates. He is almost completely covered by his armor, even his face. When he takes off his helmit, he is unearthly beautiful.

Kaiyu says: But he put blood type.
Helmet hair!
Green with a red tinge? That's BROWN.
Alina says: He's going for the holiday look.
Kaiyu says: He's also horribly tall for anyone, has the stereotypical evil villain armor- but he's unearthily beautiful. Excuse me, but I never really found hulking seven-foot demons attractive. Who can only speak in question marks...

Weapon: Guy has a 7 foot long 2 handed sword. The sword has glowing crimson red runes travelling up and down the sword.

Alina says: Well gee, I certainly wouldn't expect the runes to be crawling up and down his asscrack.

Sexual Orientation: Heterosexual
Friends: None to speak of.
Family: He won't speak of his family.

Kaiyu says: He can't speak in anything other than question marks, silly! Why would he talk about his friends or family?

Pets: Guy has a small black cat that follows him everywhere.
Hobbies: When he is alone, Guy will play his flute.

Alina says: If a Guy plays a flute when nobody's around, does anyone give a damn?
Kaiyu says: In between tentacle rapes.
Alina says: The cat is really cliche.
Kaiyu says: And why would his character have one, anyway? Granted, he never mentioned the cat in RP.
Alina says: It's a Sue thing - they need Lovable Sidekicks. And if they can't find some player to gush on them, they settle for a familiar.

Special Skills/Abilities: Guy is the best swordsman is his part of Europe. No one has matched him in skill.
History: Guy hails from the west. From the way he speaks and dresses, people assume him to be from somewhere in Europe. Guy is a Gaijin [Foreigner], and is met with extreme prejudice throught his travels.

Alina says: When in Europe does this take place?
Kaiyu says: In fact, I think I wrote up the entire part where it says rom the way he speaks and dresses, people assume him to be from somewhere in Europe. Guy is a Gaijin [Foreigner], and is met with extreme prejudice throught his travels.
Poland, maybe.
Alina says: Is that part of the RPG's setting?
Kaiyu says: The RPG takes place in Japan.
Alina says: *Falls over* The Runes would make him about 10th century Northern Ireland. Poland never had runes.
Kaiyu says: Yes, but Poland wasn't exactly notorious for great swordsmen.
Alina says: This is also true.

Guy knows not who his mother is, though he knows that his father was an Incubus (A European Demon who drains his victims of energy by copulating with them).
He wears his armor to suppress the urges of his heritage. Guy traveled to the east to escape his past...

Kaiyu says: And what does it matter? Guy's a demonic Mary Sue.
Alina says: Ah, the generic DOT DOT DOT...
Kaiyu says: Can you tell how much of this I wrote?
Kaiyu says: Any word more than five letters was my doing.
Alina says: The parts that make sense. LOL! (I have another bad one! But let's grade this first.)
Kaiyu says: Oooh, goodie.
Kaiyu says: You first.
Alina says: Because I'm assuming all the intelligent sections of the profile were written by Kaiyu, there's little to be desired here. Boring, repetitive, and just plain silly. BURN! I give it a BONFIRE rating.
Kaiyu says: Bonfire. Bonfire. BONFIRE! As a young, naive GM, I was afraid to hurt Sera's feelings by rejecting this profile. But let me tell you - you do NOT ATTEMPT TENTACLE RAPE.