Black, Roses, and Bad Sexual Innuendo Vampires

Profile written for an original creation RPG. Commented on by Kaiyu and Alina.

Kaiyu: Alrighty. Here we go, with the repetitive transsexual vampire.

Alias: Crow
Hair color: Black
Eye color: Blood Red
Age:?? (Appears to be around 16-20)
Species: Vampire/Human

Alina: "And sometimes, just sometimes, when something bad happens, the vampire comes back as a transsexual corbid." (*Cough the Crow*)

Kaiyu: At least he's not a vampire/wombat or vampire/marmoset. Those bats will bite anything.

Alina: Indeed.

Fragile build(he may look weak just don’t underestimate him), female in appearance. Long black dress that is somewhat lacy, roses are embroidered into the bottom portion near the feet at the chest area there are black belts with silver buckles strapped against his body over the dress.

Kaiyu: Near the feet at the chest area. You know, toeboobs.

Alina: So...his feet are at his chest...he's one of those flexible vampires from Cirque du Soleil.

Kaiyu: But don't underestimate him.

Alina: His weakness hides his true power...of...of...of...Well, I'll bet all those skinny models look to him as a role model.

Kaiyu: Having trouble deciding if he's a Gary Stu or a Mary Sue, there?

Alina: No.

He wears knee high boots(woman’s ones that have the heel). Also he has a rose tattoo on his left shoulder which is a black rose. Crow wears a black hanging chain necklace. His hair is black and reaches down to his back.

Alina: I sense an abnormal obsession with roses.

Kaiyu: We get it. He's a vampire. He wears black.

Alina: And roses.

Kaiyu: And black. And ROSES.

He is quiet, and can be short tempered at times but is usually level headed and down to earth but can be dark , cold and distant half of the time but can warm up to people quick, once he lets you get to know him he is some what kind and abit caring and seductive but usually he is like as if you never knew him. He’s a rainbow of personality.

Alina: This is a typical and ambiguous personality. It tells me nothing. "And can be short tempered at times". Fine. What does he do ALL the time?!

Kaiyu: *Bites lip, holds back torrent of schoolgirl giggling* I like how they say something about him, and then he contradicts it immediately afterward.

Alina: Hey Kaiyu, (seductive vampire)...Taste the rainbow.

Kaiyu:......Um..... no.

Blood, black, Night time, Birds, men, toying with humans, and anything that 'tickles his fancy'.

Kaiyu: See? Black!

Alina: He secretly likes going to the opera. At least roses aren't on this list.

Kaiyu: He has a pet lobster named Fancy, on which every Tuesday he tests various objects on to see if they make Fancy giggle. If they work, Crow takes an immediate liking to the object.

Alina: Well...that' I'm actually impressed with such an idiosyncrasy.

Kaiyu: A BLACK lobster. (I wrote that up, just in case you were confused. Not on the profile.)

Alina: With roses tattooed on its claws! (That confused me, lol.)

Kaiyu: Hence, tickling his fancy.

Humans, daytime, women, and anything else that irritates him.

Kaiyu: If he hates women, why does he dress like one?

Alina: He says right above that he likes humans! Stop contradicting yourself and be specific! What do you hate about humans? The taste? The look? (Smith) It's the smell!

Kaiyu: Look here. "Anything else that irritates him"....I'm not too fond of things that irritate me, either.

Alina: Like that itch that just won't go away. Gah. That's just more ambiguity in case he finds something later that appeals to him.

Bad Habits:
Occasional smoking and drinking.

Kaiyu: I think that composed the whole of his weaknesses.

Alina: But how would smoking be bad for a vampire? It's not like he can die from lung cancer.

Kaiyu: "I vant suck...your BLEA-ACH, HACK *Cough cough*"

Rough History and or other info:
He was born into an upper class family in the early 1600's in London, England. On one night when he was about 18 years of age, he had foolishly gone out in to the night time which he had foolishly done, little did he know he was being stalked, then the last thing he remembered of that night were the words 'My precious', and a feeling of a sudden gripping pain.

Kaiyu: I liked how he foolishly did something foolishly.

Alina: Me too. And I see Gollum has decided to make a cameo.

Kaiyu: And his sire is Gollum.

Alina: lol!

Kaiyu: Lmao! I have a feeling of sudden gripping pain as well. Fancy that.

He would awake late in the day the next day, being greeted by a servant... surely enough he would find out that he did not even care for food ..or just what he was being served, but a hunger that he couldn’t or at least wouldn’t understand until a long while later.

Kaiyu: And he awoke in the day, in the day.

Alina: He was pregnant with Gollum's child and has a bad craving for peanuts. In the DAY. Does this canon say that it takes a few days for sunlight to become lethal to vampires when they are first born?

Kaiyu: I don't know. This was from that yaoi rpg. I think continuity of any form went straight out the window.

Alina: Yea, probably. I don't get the impression that this profile has been labored over.

Once he would find out which would be some weeks later. It was when a maid had cut herself, he was drawn to it like a fly to dead animal flesh. The rest was history from then on. He would even sleep through the day and ignore anything any contact during the day and he preferred being in a darker place then where he was, only being active at night.

Kaiyu: The rest was history? What the fuck happened?

Alina: What a boring life, sucking on his maids SOMETHING for several hundred years. And is it so hard to say the word? Blood blood blood blood blood!

Kaiyu: And how much history are we talking here?

He would soon feel he’d be too much of a danger for the family, and would leave, run away if you will, wandering for at least 3 years through London, finding food here and there but barley enough to manage.

Alina: I don't even know what half this history is saying. It gets lost in the badly constructed sentences and the tenses that shift from past to present to future emphatic.

Kaiyu: He's a vampire. He doesn't need food. Was there a shortage of street people or something?

Alina: If he's a vampire, then why the hell would he care about his family anymore? Remember what he dislikes - HUMANS. Parental units and siblings should be included.

Kaiyu: But he LOVES humans. Toying with them, at least. So maybe he stuck around for the room service or something.

Alina: Either way, it requires some more clarification.

Kaiyu: I'm glad he found Barley, that's a good nutritional supplement.

Alina: Although it may cause stomach upsets.

Though he’d soon stumble upon a clan of of which contained the vampire who turned him, the 'father' of the clan. Just say soon enough he’d be with them, but he’d always stay in their den/ home and never see the outside city and how much it would change..

Alina: ...What?!?! I give up. It's unreadable. It contains words, but that's it. It's like reading 'happy happy horse apple happy petunia giggle.'

Kaiyu: *Rubs head*

just down there used over and over by all of the vampires like a child’s toy which is being passed around to by his friends so they can marvel at it and or play with it.

Alina: ...did you type that, or is that part of the profile?

Kaiyu: ....That is part of the profile.

Alina: *Rubs her eyes* This is giving me a headache.

Kaiyu: Horribly typed vague homoerotic sexual innuendo.

Alina: That actually sounds accurate.

He’d barley survive it being seldom fed.. and when he was he would be too weak to do almost nothing, so itd be like he'd be fed like a baby in a way. It wouldn’t be until 1750 or so until it had stopped .. because every single vampire there had been killed by V.slayers..

Alina: All I see is more barley!

Kaiyu: As well as the incomplete ellipses. He's too weak to do almost nothing. So...he's...doing SOMETHING.

Alina: (Crow) Can I do nothing? Can I can I can I can I?

Kaiyu: I blame this profile on Gothic angst, J-rock, and Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

Alina: Maybe a dose of Vampire Hunter D too, although I really wouldn't know, since I never saw that.

he would be the only one left. The place would be searched and they light up the place to find anything they could that was living, there had been many people who were like slaves or just people who were used for feeding on. ( well that’s all I think is important unless you count the small time he spent in an asylum maybe .. I have to think more ..)

Alina: Yes, please, use your BRAIN. I encourage it.

Kaiyu: .......What fucking asylum? That's the END?

Alina: I guess. Is there any more?

Kaiyu: Gee, uh, he was in an asylum for about ten years. Should I have put that on my resume? oh, heh. Forgot...That's it.

Alina: "Gee, I was declared clinically insane. But that's not relevant to an overview of my persona." Bonfire. It's so damn lazy that it just isn't funny anymore.

Kaiyu: F. I think they were attempting a Gothic Lolita, but it failed miserably.