Profile written for a Final Fantasy VII RPG. Commented on by Alina.
This is a rather self-explanitory example of a crap profile. For me this equalled no brains and no effort. And hell, I'm not about to put any effort into telling this dude what he did wrong, because as far as I'm concerned he doesn't want to try.
-name Seto Kiaba
Okay, that's fine. I'm ignoring the fact that Seto is the name of Nanaki's father.
[May 22, 2003: ED'S NOTE: As Sailor Freak was so kind to point out, Seto Kiaba is the name of a character from the anime series Yu-Gi-Oh!. While this particular RPG didn't mind characters being named after other characters, it just shows even less originality. So I revoke the 'passing grade' for the name! This just goes to show what I watch and what I don't :P]
-height 6' 2"
He's young, but so are 90% of the roleplay characters, and it's quite possible to have a large proportion of youth in the population after a post-climactic event such as the Meteor Crisis. (I think everyone would be off snogging if they thought they were going to die by the hand of a giant evil Meteor ;) )
-appearance (hair color, weight, eye color) Black Hair 65kg with Emerald Green Eyes
Some commas would have been nice. But here's the real kicker:
-history Was born in Ireland Lives in Tokyo Japan
Uh...honey? There ain't no Ireland or Japan in the FF7 world. Furthermore, Seto isn't a Celtic name, so I don't even see the relevance in making the alteration. What was he going for? A coolness factor, maybe? Who knows.
F. This is why I encourage the use of brains when writing.