Part Two

Kaiyu: Shall I go grab Maddie?

Alina: Yes. I'll bet she knows more about Guilty Gear than me :3

Madhatter: WOOT!

Alina: Well, both of you.

Madhatter: Guilty Gear is LOOOOVE! And anyone who kills it must DIE!

Kaiyu: In our LAST chapter, Raven badmouthed her mom, killed about half of their staff of maids, jumped from age fourteen to sixteen, and called Justice Seigi. :3

Alina: And jumped out of a one-story building filled with housemaids.

Kaiyu: And, to top it all off: The author makes it INCREDIBLY clear she knows nothing of the canon. And look! Time for another disclaimer!

Madhatter: ... Do these maids multiply like Agent Smith?

Alina: Possibly.

What Else Could Go Wrong?
 
Disclaimer: I don’t own Guilty Gear X2 or any of its characters! I only own Raven!
 
FYI: I’m putting it in here for lack of better category!

Madhatter: FYI: I think you should be shot in the head...

Alina: You mean it doesn't fit in the Recycle bin?

Madhatter: *ish violent today... doesn't know why*

Also, I’m not really sure about the character’s personalities so I’m just doing what I interpreted about the characters from playing the game… Please don’t blame me if their personalities are really mixed up or they’re just not acting like they probably would! If there’s any real serious problem with their attitudes, tell me about the problem and what they would normally act like…

Kaiyu: At least she's willing to learn. T_T;

Alina: I already trashed this comment, so I'll move along.

Kaiyu: But yes, we BLAME you.

Madhatter: If she didn't know what these characters were like then why did she write the fic? Stupid woman!

Alina: She's lucky she doesn't live with Mayans. In their culture, laziness was a crime punishable by death.

Madhatter: You always write about what you know! Not what you don't know!

But, if you say it all totally wrong, yet you have no idea what they act like or you say they act like the same way their acting in my story, I’ll totally ignore you, or I’ll do something else that’s horrible!

Kaiyu: Like continuing the fic, maybe.

Madhatter: Well, this means I get to complain *cracks knuckles* Wait... weird brain moment here... wasn't Raven Axl's other name?

Kaiyu: Yes. Exactly.

Alina: So basically, if you point out she's wrong, she doesn't give a shit. And yet she wants to apologize.....Riiiiight...

Madhatter: *Evil glare*

Kaiyu: Raven: Canon character. Fakeraven: Irritating otaku gear.

Madhatter: Oh no that bitch didn't! I will snatch her head bald! *snaps fingers*

Kaiyu: Maddie likes Axl. n.n;

And this is the last chapter that I’m saying this in, so beware of the shadow beasts that Raven might send after you!!!!
And yes, I do know that most of you don’t know much Japanese so if you’re wondering what a word means, look at the bottom of the page!

Kaiyu: I'd like to note that most of the Japanese she uses is WRONG.

Madhatter: .... Who cares... if you're going to write a story, you're supposed to make the story for the viewer as well, or else the story does not get read! She knows nothing about being a writer... it she does attempt to be one... she'll probably end up living in a cardboard box on a street. Lack of sources, lack of writing skills, and most of alll... a lack of brain.

Alina: Oh well, she also has to learn that once she's published something, it's open to the public to critisize!

Chapter 1: Meet the Shadow Mistress!

Kaiyu: Can we just not and say we did?

Madhatter: Yes...*huggles her Venom, Axl, Ky, Chipp, and Johnny dolls, and then throws a bridget doll at Kaiyu*

Kaiyu: *is hit in the face. Dies.*

Dizzy looked at May and Erin. “What are we going to do now? We’ve gone shopping, ate, went to the beach, and everything else there is to do!”
“I have an idea!” Erin said happily. “Why don’t we sit in the shade, eating ice cream and pointing out all the cute guys!”

Madhatter: *Blinks* Er... On with the fic!! *walks over to Kaiyu and resucitates him*

Kaiyu: Who the hell is Erin? ;_;

Madhatter: Some anonymous person who is supposed to be her friend I take it.

Kaiyu: Does she mean April? Because I REALLY don't want to deal with another Sue. ;_; I'm just... going to pretend it's April for now... ;_;

Madhatter: Hey... I know a person named Erin...

Kaiyu: So do I. Maybe it's her.

Madhatter: Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh... okies...

Kaiyu: (April's the helmsman for May's ship... the, uh, Mayship.)

Madhatter: (Ahk sooo...I don't want her character associating with any cool characters in GG)

“That’s a great idea!” May said.

Madhatter: Before she got stabbed in the head.

Kaiyu: You know, that's surprisingly in character for May. e_e;;

Alina: And then, along came June, who was bugging September for some money.

Madhatter: Oh wait, that's MAY! ACK! I thought that was... Raven....

Kaiyu: Guilty Gear has all these girls named after months. It's weird. They're all part of this air pirate battallion. >>;

Madhatter: It's so cute ^_^

“May! I don’t think Johnny would like you doing something like that!” Dizzy said.
“You’re just worried that Testament will catch you! Don’t worry, Dizzy! We’ll be fine! C’mon!” May dragged Dizzy over to an ice cream stand and the three girl ordered ice cream and found a table in the shade of a tree.

Alina: Okay ^^

Madhatter: Erm... Testament doesn't want to 'catch her.' Testament wanted to protect her...Stupid unknowing evil... *blares out curse words and then some*

Kaiyu: Where ARE they? Are they on LAND?

Alina: They're on the MOON! With moon bunnies!

Kaiyu: If they're on LAND, why isn't Dizzy being attacked by 80 billion people?

Madhatter: I'm assuming they are on the Mayship...

Kaiyu: There's a tree.

Madhatter: Although once again she's lacking specification...Stupid Turd Muffin...

Alina: There's trees on boats. But only cruiseships.

Madhatter: *Notices she's been reduced to insulting the actual person in this fic... mostly because she's a big Guilty Gear fan, and has been playing it since the first game came out.* Okay... so then... they are on land... at a mall or something... wanting to point out cute boys? Why isn't May babbling about how wonderful Johnny is?

Kaiyu: Come on down, to the Jellyfish Cruise Lines, with Captain May! SEE! The wonderful sights and sounds of a 100 ton airship! TASTE! The cooking of the gear Dizzy! FEEL! Or... be feeled up, by Johnny!

Elsewhere………

Johnny sighed. He wondered if Testament noticed the missing Dizzy. Erin and May are slacking off again… he thought to himself.

Madhatter: Johnny would never sigh out of boredom or wonderment! He always has something to do! Specially checking out chicks and seeing if there are any unattended orphans!

Kaiyu: And then, Johnny....wondered why an ellipsis was being used....to signify thought.....

Madhatter: Cuz Johnny's... the man! *rock and roll music flares up*

“Johnny, have you seen Dizzy?” Testament walked up to Johnny. He had the same old frown on his face.
“I was wondering the same thing about you… Nope, haven’t seen her since breakfast… I haven’t seen May or Erin either……”

Alina: They're off making out without you Johnny!

Madhatter: Testament is the sad no more! Testament had become the Happy! The Happpy! She's really kicking these characters out of character.

Kaiyu: I still want to know who Erin is and what she did with April.

Madhatter: Or December, or October, or September... of February... and... you get the idea.

Johnny sighed. “What’s new…… They’re probably wondering around town or something…… I wouldn’t start really worrying until about an hour before dinnertime… If they still haven’t been seen, then we’ll go look for them…” He leaned against the wall.
"Oh, they're probably wandering around town. Being attacked by the local populace because of the bounties on their heads. Did I remind you about the bounties?"

Madhatter: Oh yes.. I remember those...

Kaiyu: Yeah. Weren't they the premise of the entire second game, or something?

“You’re so lazy……… No wonder May and Erin get by you without being noticed……” Testament sighed and walked away.

Back to our favorite girls……

Madhatter: Lazy??? LAZY??? LAZY?????!

Kaiyu: *Cough* Things Guilty Gear Characters Would Never Say, Part One!

Madhatter: May: I like other boys... Johnny is non important. I neglect the Johnny and go to the mall with these other two girls.

Kaiyu: Actually, she says that in the next line.

Madhatter: OH my... GODDDD!

Erin pointed. “That guy’s pretty cute!” she giggled. Dizzy and May looked at where she was pointing.
“Nah, not really… Now that guy’s cute!” May pointed in the opposite direction.
“Actually, that guys really cute…” Dizzy pointed in some other direction.

Madhatter: Dizzy: I think he's hot...

Kaiyu: I really can't picture Dizzy picking up guys. ;.;

Madhatter: In actuality Dizzy would never say anything like that... she's too damn SHY! Plus they have a bounty on her head...

Kaiyu: Proper Dizzy: Um... Hi... do you know where the store is? ;.;

Madhatter: I really don't think they'd be stupid enough to draw attention to themselves... well May might... but uh.. yah

Kaiyu: BadDizzy: OMG LOL you're so HOT!!!111111eleven!

Madhatter: Or it means like, "Excuse me"

Kaiyu: No. Excuse me is "Sumimasen" or "Shitsurei Shimasu." :3 BUT ANYWAY!

Madhatter: True.

“Hey! You! Leave the lil’ lady alone!” Johnny said pointing at the man.
“And if I don’t?”

Alina: (Johnny) I'll bake pancakes!

Kaiyu: Dude. That's the first thing Johnny's said that's remotely in character. I think he may still be alive.

Madhatter: Johnny is officially talking talking to himself though. There's no indication that another person was talking. So Johnny now has Multiple Personality Disorder.

Kaiyu: (Blue Hair Man) D'ooooh.... PANCAKES! Foiled again!

Alina: (Man) and they have maple syrup too!

“Then you’ll have to deal with us!” Erin said as May stuck out her tongue. At this moment, with the man distracted, and to the fact he had let go of one of her arms, Raven took her chance, and punched the man in the stomach.
“Huh?” Johnny said surprised at the young girl’s action

Alina: Oh, no! She's sticking her tougne at us! they're have to surrender for sure now!

Kaiyu: Gee. If I was being assaulted, I would NEVER think to fight back.

“Leave me alone!” The girl shouted.
“Come with us! You’ll be safe!” May said. Raven nodded. She followed them back to the ship, losing the man somewhere in the crowd.

Alina: Wow, that was hard.

Kaiyu: Yes. Leave her alone, unsupervised. Let her get hit by a truck. Random villains in this day and age don't have much drive. But they ARE important enough to have interesting hair colors.

Alina: It helps differentiate from the other random villains. there's just so many of them, that they all agreed to have varying shades of hair colour and style.
(Man 1) I call blue!
(Man 2) Damn! I wanted blue. So I call....CERULEAN!

“Who are you?” Johnny asked
“Watashi wa…… I am Raven Lynn Valentine…” Raven said bowing slightly, blushing at her mistake of using Japanese instead of English like she was told to do many times before. “Arigato! Um… I mean, thank you…”

Kaiyu: STOP IT. STOP THE FREAKING OTAKU SPEAK. RAVEN LYNN VALENTINE IS JUST -SUCH- A JAPANESE NAME. I MEAN, MY GOD.

Alina: I say this: look, unless you NEED the other language per se, don't include it. just write the damn dialogue in English and say that they were speaking Japanese, or whatever. ESPECIALLY if you don't know anything about the language other than "BAKA!"

“You’re welcome!” Erin said.
“Who are you? I would like to know the names of the people who helped me back there…”
“My name’s  Johnny… This is May, Erin, Dizzy, and Testament!” Johnny said, pointing to each one as he said their name. “Uh, are you okay?

Kaiyu: (Testament) We're not important enough to have Dialogue.
(May) I continue to be completely uniniterested in Johnny.

Alina: Is she okay? Let's see, she was just chased around by a random enemy. I don't think so. Honestly, they're dumbing down the characters, even I can tell.

“Okagesama de genki desu…… I’m sorry, I have a bad habit of speaking my native language instead of English… What I meant to say is: Yes, thanks to you I’m fine!” Raven smiled sheepishly.

Kaiyu: Should I get the eye-spoons?

Alina: (Shakes her head) If she has this bad of a habit of speaking in Japanese, it's a wonder she hasn't been caught yet.
(Raven) I speak a language you don't! I'm special, and I'll just flaunt it now to emphasize how special I am!

“We didn’t really do anything… Did we?” Erin asked.
“You distracted him, making him let go of one of my arms, allowing me to hit him! I can’t fight without my hands! I have to have at least one to fight!”

Alina: She just gave away her weakness! Quick, let's chop her hands off!

Kaiyu: Why stop there?

“Why did he want you so bad? He chased us half of the way here!” Dizzy said.
“I’m not sure……… I don’t even know who he is!”
Johnny shook his head. “He had to have a really good reason to want you the way he did, or he’d never had chased you as far and as long as he did… I’d be worried if I was you…”

Alina: Are they blind? I thought all Japanese people are supposed to be quarantined!

Kaiyu: *Sighs*

“I try not to worry about these things………… He’s been after me for a while now… this is my first encounter with him……” Raven said.

Kaiyu: She manages to contradict herself in the same sentence. Wow. That's a feat.

Alina: How can you MISS that when you're writing? I do not understand.

“Well, you can stay here for awhile, if you want…” Johnny said.
Raven’s eyes went wide. “Really! Domo aritgato gozaimas! Um… I mean… Thank you very much…” she smiled.

Kaiyu: "NO, I'M NOT JAPANESE AT ALL! 8D;;;;" And it's Domo Arigato Gozaimasu.

A/N: If you like this story so far, check out my other stories! I mean, they aren’t about Guilty Gear, but, hey! Some people actually think they’re kinda good!

Kaiyu: These people were later euthanized.

Alina: They begged for it.

Kaiyu: Scoretime.

Alina: Obvious Sue. lack of knowledge of the fandom, mangling of the English AND Japanese languages. And I'm coming from an outsider's point of view. BONFIRE. It didn't deserve Nuke in my opinion, but bonfire at the very least.

Kaiyu: I'm giving it a bonfire. It was terrible, horrible, and didn't know ANYTHING of the fandom. The girl can spell (most of the time,) but it's otherwise crap. However, I DO think Maddie will nuke this.