Profile written for a Fushigi Yuugi RPG. Commented on by Kaiyu and Alina.
Kaiyu: It's been a while since we've had a bad profile to mock. >:D
Alina: I know. WTF?! I'll skip the personal info.
PAST LIFE (Omit for mikos!)
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Seishi Name: Ashitare
Seishi Mark: Bi (tail)
Location of Mark: on right hip
Seishi Powers: Can change into a wolf at will, is very strong too stong
for his own good sometimes
Alina: I guess his sentences are too strong for periods as well.
Kaiyu: Only sometime, when his own good isn't good enough.
OVERVIEW
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Current Name: Scott Wolf (the teenage werewolf)
his close friends call him scott all others call him wolf
Gender: M
Age: 34
Height and Build: 213 cm and very muscular
Hair: blueish/black (ish guessing)
Eyes: (i cant really see his eyes in the pic can you?) . _ .
Kaiyu: This is a canon character, by the way. I'm sure they'll fuck it up gloriously.
Alina: With a name like Scott Wolf? I think it's already been fucked up. This isn't Big Wolf on Campus, player. And if it were, I'd be very afraid.
Skin Color: black
Other Distinguishing Marks: his fangs of course and a bunch of scars
Personality: a bit on the sarcatic side
but his medicine keeps it from showing too badly
the medicine is also supposed to depress the erge to go on a rampage
Alina: I'm sorry, but the personality cracks me up. It's such a one-sided piece of crap.
Kaiyu: Okay, no, this ISN'T a canon character. Ashitare was, Scott definitely isn't. If you're a teen wolf, shouldn't you be a fucking teenager?
Alina: Scott is the 'reincarnation' of Ashitare, which is part of the game's backstory.
Kaiyu: Or is he some aging hipster desperately clinging to his youth?
Alina: He's a hippie that can't get laid. So he lives at home with his mom and eats Kraft Dinner.
Kaiyu: What is sarcatic, anyway? Since it requires medicine, I'm going to say it's a horrible debilitating disease.
Alina: What's erge Is it like another form for ergo?
Kaiyu: It must be.
SEISHI POWERS: is very strong and can change into a wolf at will
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Have your seishi powers manifested in this life yet? yes
Alina: This person seems to be trying to drive the point home that his character is STRONG. Might be just me, though.
Kaiyu: It's like Big O. THEY REALLY WANT YOU TO KNOW THE GIRL IS A ROBOT. Just in case you can't FIGURE IT OUT FOR YOURSELF.
If yes, describe the first time you used your seishi powers:
it was what made the mafia capture him they were chasing
something/someone
(i dunno who or what i know very little about the Mafia)
Alina: "Let's write the Mafia into this for absolutely no reason except the fact that they're so cool with all their cloak-and-dagger shit!"
Kaiyu: "Hey, Vinnie! This guy, he's-a strong! Let's bring him to the Godfather!" "Ngyeaaah!"
and Scott used his emence strenth to stop them however
he got captured because if it and he now works for them
though it did take alot to bring the big black man down
(when he was younger his apperance was like the big black man
in the green mile mixed with the asitare muscularity in the other pic
i sent you and when he is in the cage think of the look of wolverine
from the movie x-men with the same muscularity and blackish skin
thats how he sorta looks now he is slowly turning into the ashitare
of the past although he probally wont look like him until he gets
older)
Alina: I'll just state the obvious: Punctuation. Grammar. Spellcheck. Capital letters at the beginning of sentences and proper nouns. This profile NEEDS them desperately.
Kaiyu: I'm speechless.
Alina: Does he magically heal people's hernias like the guy in the Green Mile? Or does he have retractable steel blades embedded into his hands like Wolverine?
Kaiyu: How about a retractable steel hernia?
Alina: That would be acceptable.
Effect: it is making him slowly turn into the ashitare (the asshitare
pic i sent)
of the past although he probally wont look like him until he gets older
What triggers your seishi powers? . _ .
Alina: I would ASSUME he's turning into his past self. I think that's what the game's about. But I do not understand why he didn't answer the second question. I guess it was beyond his mental capacity to realize that chances are, he can't control his powers at will.
Kaiyu: I just like how he misspelled his character's name.
Alina: Asshit. Eeehe. Maybe he meant Asshat.
MEMORIES: you mean beside his past life memorie ne?
not much if he has any he keeps them to himself (yah that sounds good)
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What memories do you have of your past life? he somewhat remembers
nakago and
being an animal but he atunes this memorie to his love of dogs and the
dog species
he dismisses his memorie of nakago because the memories he has are not
good ones
Alina: "It's a bad memory. So it can't be real. Nothing bad ever happens to me!"
Kaiyu: He has no memories, hence he is an amnesiac or has a brain disorder. Which is more realistic?
Alina: I'm thinking brain disorder. Then we can throw in the whole past life as being part of his delusion.
PERSONAL LIFE: usually stays secluded in his home exept for personal
needs
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Family Life (siblings/parents/pets): has one dog named shadow angel he
prefers dogs above all else though he dont know why he loves dog
species but he feels a connection there
Friends: no-one in particular shadow angel (his dog) is probally his
best friend
Alina: So he stayed in his house for schooling, shopping, partying, and so on, but when he has to take a crap he goes outside? And that would make a FANTASTIC roleplay experience. "Day 1: I'm locked in my house with my NPC dog. Day 125: I'm still in my house. The wallpaper's fraying a little. Dog NPC abandoned me two weeks ago. Am still bitter."
Kaiyu: His dog is named Shadow Angel?
Alina: Yes.
Kaiyu: What a stupid fucking name. That's animal abuse and I'm calling the ASPCA.
Idea of "fun": he don't know the meaning of the word i dont think
but he does go on rampages every now and then
i guess you can say he considers that as fun
Alina:
This would be a fucking boring character to play. Doesn't the player realize
this?
(Character) In house. Out rampaging. In house. Out rampaging.
Kaiyu: Rampaging with DOGS.
Alina: He's the arch enemy in the upcoming Catwoman movie.
he more does it as a releif when his medication don't work
but his real joy is being around dogs and other canine specieces
(wolves, foxes, etc.)
Kaiyu: Rampaging with DOGS. Elly, you know damn well he won't be playing his character with any regards to his profile.
Alina: Actually, that completely slipped my mind. ^^;;
Favorite hang out: he usually don't leave his home except for the
ocasional rampage and to do important things like shopping, etc. but i guess
his favourite hangout is pet stores and the like
What is your social class? he is anti-social i guess you could say he
likes his seclusion
Education: collage graduate
Alina: Dude, if he walked into my pet store, I'd kick him out in five seconds.
Kaiyu: I have to reiterate this- Antisocial does NOT mean you're a loner.
Alina: *nodnod*
Kaiyu: Antisocial does NOT mean you're angsty and misunderstood.
Alina: But hey - if this character were let into the game, the other players could theoretically just ignore him.
Profession: he could be anything he disires problem is he disires
nothing
Alina: So if he has no job, how does he, you know, buy food?
Morals: he has none
Goals: what goals
Special Skills: he has a way with animals it is like they understand
him or something
Kaiyu: Antisocial MEANS you have a personality disorder and feel no remorse for doing repugnant things because you CAN'T UNDERSTAND THE CONCEPT.
Alina: Maybe he means social anxiety disorder.
Kaiyu: Maybe he means GARY FUCKING STU DISORDER. Or perhaps these are all symptoms of SACATICISM.
Alina: Or possibly IDIODICY.
Kaiyu: I don't know. I just know he should be quarantined.
ET CETERA
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Likes: to read and be around animals
Dislikes: his past and forgetting to take his medication
Bans: . _ .
Quirks: being around the canine species
Bad habits: growling
Alina: Bad dog! *forces character's mouth shut* No barking! And, rolling into the finish line, the BACKSTORY. Prepare for no paragraphs or punctuation.
Kaiyu: *Waits for it.*
He had a troublesome child hood always getting beated and whipped
for various reasons he never really knew why his parents beat him
he never talks about it because he gets depressed when he does if
he ever thinks about it usually causes him to go on a rampage
he tries not to think of it often the medicine helps supress this erge
he was taken from his home one day by a Mafia group in Richmond
that runs a street fighting ring they captured him to fight people
he is now a prisoner but he dont complain he gets to put his strenth
to good use and get free meals when he wins he must win or face
being beat by them when this happens it reminds him of his child hood
and it takes all his will to not go berserk and rip out every throat in
the joint
Alina: *just.....dies* I don't even think I NEED to say anything.
Kaiyu: I'm not going to read that. All I saw was ANGST STUPID ANGST ANGST STUPID WAH WAH I'M STRONG WAH STUPID STUPID MANLY MANLY STUPID WAH WAH ANGST DOG ANGST STUPID STUPID RETARD CHILDHOOD BAGGAGE WAH STUPID ANGST MAFIA STUPID STUPID FUCKNUT ANGST STUPID BANANA.
Alina: You forgot the "I can KICK THE SHIT OUT OF ANYTHING!!111" No wait, you included that. Never mind. Okay. Grading time!
Kaiyu: F. This sack of shit needs to be put to sleep.
Alina: F as well. Euthanasia is recommended.
Kaiyu: Down, boy.